Stop calling Black women angry. Stop judging us by what you see on reality television. Stop holding Black women accountable for misogyny, the internet, and social pressure. It is not fair to us.

And hear me out. Believe me I get it. I am raised in the same culture where sisters are being praised on how far they can drag another Black woman on the internet. Where their respectability factor is being gauged on who is the last baby mama to some no where rapper.

We live in a time where Black women on television are not represented as nothing more than plastic, yelling, hoeing heathens.  Most of us, we know it isn’t true. We watch these shows for hilarious entertainment because surely our own lives are not this dramatic. We secretly stalk the gossip sites to read the latest tea and watch videos of the women fighting and cursing each other out. We justify it by saying – that’s not my life. And guess what sis? It isn’t.

But for those who don’t have much interaction with Black women, they see shows like that and assume this is how all of us act. Can you imagine how that feels? Of course you can because if you are a Black woman, I can bet at some time in your life, a person of a different culture has been so surprised at how well mannered you are, how proper you speak, or the fact that you are actually married to your child’s father.

Stop calling Black women angry.

Call us strong. Call us empowered. Sprinkle us with some of that #blackgirlmagic we so proudly flaunt. Black women are not angry. We are mothers, wives, nurturers. We are women who stand together and work together to uplift each other. That is who we are. That is what we must answer by.

So even as Black women, we do hold some responsibility here. We must learn not to thrive on drama. If we want some dramatics, let’s go watch a play. Let us invest in a weekend hike through the rain forest with our girlfriends. There’s some drama for you. 

Call us strong. Call us empowered. Sprinkle us with some of that #blackgirlmagic we so proudly flaunt.

As Black women, let’s support each other and our families. Let us show the world that our children can be raised in two parent households, peaceful co parenting environments. Let’s walk hand in hand with our sisters because we are each other’s keeper. Remember, no one will have your back like another Black woman. 

Let us continue to be good mothers, wives, business women, and community leaders. And hey, this is just a friendly reminder. 

With love,


Information on the shirt:

The “Not Your Angry Black Woman” movement was started by Toi D’Lane because she needed to get something off of her chest. She wanted to show the average woman that they do not stand alone but in fact we are all in this together. She aspires to help women feel normal again and to remember that the negative images that we are fed through television and social media are not the standard for Black women. Help support this Black woman owned business by purchasing her shirt “Not Your Angry Black Woman” here