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I Am Not Here To Judge Tyrese and Neither Should You

Image Credit: TMZ

This morning I received a DM on Instagram from a close friend of mine.

“Are you going to bring this up? So many debates on his situation”

Ugh.

I rolled my eyes deep to the back of my head. I did not want to touch this ish with a ten foot pole. I did not want to come near it for many reasons. We are not a celebrity drama blog but this topic is something that myself and our readers have gone through. I am slightly annoyed by Tyrese, I won’t lie. I have not always agreed with his antics in the past and at first glance at his “situation”, I saw an overly emotional man whining about some dramatic thing in his life. But then I realized that this dramatic thing was his daughter. This man is crying out for help to see his child.  

I saw an overly emotional man whining about some dramatic thing in his life.

Here are the facts:

Tyrese’s ex-wife, Norma Mitchell has made claims that the actor had been verbally and physically abusive towards her during the course of their marriage. Tyrese claims that Norma is trying to keep his daughter away from him due to spite. Norma has filed and dropped abuse claims against her ex husband. 

Tyrese has went on a series of social media rants against past co stars that has everyone questioning his sanity. He claims he is going broke in legal fees and has taken some extreme measures to contact his daughter, including flying a plane over her school telling her how much he loves her. *Insert face palm emoji here*. 

Listen.

As a single woman who is in an amicable co-parenting relationship, this is tough. My first reaction? Tyrese you suck. You caused this. You. You. You.

That’s what I want to say. But I also realize blaming him for every downfall in this drama is pointless. The reality is, this is not about Tyrese or Norma. Their beautiful daughter, Shayla, is the one who is at stake here. We live in a world where every personal indiscretion is placed online and judged among a party of our peers. I am not here to judge Tyrese and neither should you. 

We live in a world where every personal indiscretion is placed online and judged among a party of our peers.

If you have never found yourself having to split the custody of your child with the other parent, I pray it never happens for you. For all of us who have experienced it, we know it is one of the hardest battles you will have to face in your life. Adults turn into children and every deeply intimate occurrence in the relationship becomes fuel for each party. 

LOS ANGELES, CA – NOVEMBER 22: Recording artist Tyrese Gibson and Shayla Gibson arrive at the 2015 American Music Awards at Microsoft Theater on November 22, 2015 in Los Angeles, California. (Photo by David Livingston/Getty Images)

Should the personal indiscretions between ex husband and wife be used to keep one parent away?

I am also not 100% sold on this mental disability claim but that is neither here nor there. Until a professional analysis is done, I simply cannot discount his actions to that. What I do see is a man deeply unraveled by not seeing his daughter, the court system, and the opinion of being in the public eye. Granted, these are all variables that can cause a person to lose his mind but for everyone out there who is truly suffering from mental health issues, prescribing this diagnosis without the help of a doctor is unfair. 

So, what is to be said here? This is ugly. It is painful. It is tough. I will not make this into a conversation about mental health in the Black community because there are far more deserving cases that require that attention. I will focus on the strife and difficulty of co-parenting after a nasty separation. I will encourage each and every parent to realize that co-parenting is not really for your comfort but is only about what is best for our children. And unless that child is being placed in harm’s way, it is never OK to keep a child away from one of their parents. 

Tell us fam, what are your thoughts on this?

With love, 

-Shanicia

Shanicia Boswell
ADMINISTRATOR
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Hi, I’m Shanicia! I live in Atlanta, GA. I’m a fulltime mom to one pretty rambuncious little girl. I love cooking, coloring Mandalas, and reading. To find out why I started Black Moms Blog, read our very first blog post!

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